i think the more i talk to her, the more i feel that i hate her. not my fault. i'm just over-sensitive and possessive like that =X i wouldnt be disgusted if she wasnt such a hypocrite. and there she goes talking about other people being hypocrite. ironically, sometimes i feel jealous of her. not for the hypocrite part, hell no! but for other aspects of her.

talking about jealousy, some people are just born lucky and worth to be envied. it's really not the best feeling at all. when i cant get what i want, i feel upset. so it's best not to desire anything at all, right? but then again, what's the purpose of living a life without it? living a desire-less dull happy life? to feel happy when you get something and to just forget it if you cant make it. i wish i could make myself going into that direction.

and lately i'm just sick of this fandom

i was just thinking, did i make a wrong decision not going to thai for the interest of my very own pride personal matter? i definitely want to see jae again but i just dont want to because of an undisclosed reason =P and here i am still cant smile nor laugh heartily in front of my parents for a little promise i made to myself. i guess this is going to be a long way if i dont see joongie soon ><;;

I've got a mind boggling, sense numbing, heart pounding, stomach flipping, take-my-breath-away, head-over-heels, knee shaking, daydreaming, butterfly fluttering crush on you.





























credits to the amazing gpx artists who made this lovely icons~ <3